What to do if a 10 year old girl is lying. How to wean a child from lying: psychological methods and techniques, tips and tricks

Occasionally. But innocent children's lies can develop into a chronic problem, and seriously damage the relationship between children and parents.

The child cannot prevent this on his own. Only parents should deal with the problem. And first of all, you need to figure out why the child is lying, and why his lies have become regular. Ekaterina Kes, a child and family psychologist, writes about the reasons that make a child lie on her blog.

Many parents are faced with the fact that the child tells lies - lies and deceives. As a rule, the reaction of parents to such behavior is to scold, shame, punish the child. But once you begin to understand why your child lies and cheats, then you can help him change his behavior and become more honest.

The key word here is "help". Do not force, do not force, namely to help the child not to lie and deceive, but to tell you the truth.

If we start to figure out why the child is lying, we will see that he is just the same afraid of punishment, screaming and being scolded. It's kind of a vicious circle. The more we scold the child for lying, the more he will hide the truth from us in the future. What is the way out of this?

Children, as a rule, find quite logical reasons to hide the truth - they want to avoid unpleasant consequences for themselves, they don’t want to disappoint their parents, they don’t want to listen to screams and hourly moralizing.

How to understand why a child is lying: the reasons for children's lies

The child lies because he is afraid of punishment

It is hard for a child not to lie when he knows that a very unpleasant outcome awaits him for the truth. Therefore, understanding all these reasons, we need to create such conditions in the family so that the child can easily tell us everything as it is.

The child does not lie, he embellishes reality

It happens that the child wants to embellish the situation in order to impress others, to gain more weight in the eyes of others. This happens when the child feels that the way he is, he is not good enough.
Instead of scolding, he needs to be understood and reassured that everything is in order with him and it is absolutely unnecessary for him to invent something about himself that is not really there.

The child deceives not on purpose, but out of misunderstanding

He is sure that he is telling the truth, but, in fact, he describes the situation not as it really was, but as he understood or remembered it. In this case, it is completely unfair to talk about deception.

Children's lies as psychological protection

Fantasizing for children works as a psychological defense that helps to cope with some difficult circumstances. For example, a child's dog died. He does not want to believe it and fantasizes that the dog actually just ran away and lives in the forest. At the same time, he himself begins to believe in this fantasy so much that he tells others about it. Can we say in this case that the child is cheating? No. He uses fantasy to protect himself from painful experiences for which he was not prepared. In his subjective, inner world, the dog really lives in the forest. And he believes in it.

What should parents do if their child is lying?

Once again, when we punish children for lying, they continue to lie in the hope of avoiding any punishment in the future. The following tips will help you create a climate in your family where it is easy for children to tell the truth. But be patient: change will take time.

Try not to frighten the child with your emotional reactions to his actions, offensive words, screaming, threats and punishments. Such reactions do not educate children for the future, do not teach them something new. They help you blow off steam, but they instill fear in your child.

Focus not on blaming the child for what happened, but on a joint search for a way out of the current situation. Ask the child, “What can we do now to correct the consequences?” Instead of getting angry and blaming, think together about what can be done now.

When we ask questions to which we already know the answer, we ourselves are pushing our child to lie in the hope that you will leave him behind. Instead, underline in your question how to resolve the situation. For example: “I see that there is still a bunch of your things on the floor, do you need help to clean them up or can you do it yourself?” or “Do you want to put your clothes away now or when you finish dinner?” Such questions allow the child to engage in active discussion, “save face”, prevent a “power struggle” with him, and you help him focus on the plan of action, on what needs to be done, instead of preparing an excuse or inventing something .

Do not try to “catch” the child on deceit, do not attack him with accusations: “Why are you lying to me? I raised a liar! Tell me the truth!" Instead, try to get to the root of the problem and understand why your child cannot tell you the truth in this situation.

Say something like this: “What you are saying does not sound very believable. It seems to me that for some reason you just can't tell me how it really was. Maybe you are afraid of something? Let's talk about it and discuss the situation together. It's always better to tell the truth as it is."

It often happens that the child first tells a lie, and then corrects himself and confesses. And often parents, instead of praising the child for the courage to tell the truth and his confession, continue to scold him for the fact that at first he nevertheless deceived them. He corrected himself, took a step in the right direction, and the parents still emphasize that at first he told a lie.

The child receives a lesson: "Confess or don't confess - it won't get better." So that the child does not draw such conclusions, but understands that his confession will be of great benefit and lead to a constructive discussion, it is necessary to note the sincerity of the child, to praise his honesty.

Say that you love the child just like that, no matter what, even if he gets into trouble and makes mistakes. Make sure your child knows for sure that despite his misdeeds, mistakes or bad behavior, you will never love him less. This helps the child feel safe and open up to you more.

Remember that our children learn from us. It happens that we ourselves deceive children over trifles and believe that this is “nothing to worry about. For example, we say to the child: “If you are going to take a quick walk now, I will buy you ice cream.” And then it turns out that we didn’t take the money, or changed our minds, because “it’s almost time for lunch,” etc. Make sure to always tell the truth in the presence of a child (and not only), and keep your word.

Even if you have caught a child cheating several times, never call him offensive words. They have no pedagogical meaning, but only complicate the situation. The child sooner or later comes to terms with such labels and begins to feel exactly who you call him. Especially do not do this in the presence of strangers. This is very humiliating, and will greatly complicate your relationship.

Try to resolve such situations within the family and help the child save face in front of other adults and his friends. This will help him change faster.

Lies in their various manifestations are an integral part of human social life. It is worth remembering that so many times during the day we deceive someone, we tell half-truths, withholding part of the information. This behavior is considered quite normal. And really, is it worth it to honestly tell a colleague that she had an unsuccessful haircut, or tell an elderly relative that she is mortally tired of you with her talk about health?

But if adults treat their own lies quite normally, then children's lies cause a sharply negative reaction. Having discovered that a son or daughter is telling a lie, mothers and fathers often panic and begin to frantically search for an answer to the question, how to wean a child from lying?

First of all, it is worth distinguishing between fantasy and lies. The former are completely harmless and even, on the contrary, natural for children. By imagining, the baby develops his creative abilities. And, according to K. Chukovsky, the age from 2 to 5 years is the greatest flowering of creativity and flight of fancy.

Various "notions" during the game. Carried away by the game, the child can believe that the detail from the designer is a secret device, and the matchbox is a carriage for the princess.

Fantasies on various harmless themes. Kids often tell all sorts of incredible stories, however, it would be wrong to call them lies.

Fears. Preschoolers often experience a variety of fears. A child who is firmly convinced that “Babay” is hiding under his bed in the dark is not lying at all. If such fears are obsessive and do not go away after 7-8 years, parents should definitely contact a psychologist.

Read also: How to get your child to do homework without unnecessary problems

Lies, unlike fantasies, are always selfish. Trying to lie, the child pursues a specific goal: to avoid punishment, to get something, etc.

Toddlers are incapable of conscious lies; a child can begin to lie consciously at the age of about 6 years.

Reasons for a child to lie

To wean a child from lying, you need to try to find out exactly what reasons prompt him to tell a lie. Most often, these are:

fear of punishment;
an attempt at self-justification after committing a bad deed;
the desire to look more significant in the eyes of others;
desire to perform an action that is prohibited by parents;
conflicting expectations.

Sometimes there are cases of pathological lies, it is better to deal with such problems in tandem with a psychologist.

Knowing the reasons for telling a lie, it is much easier to fight this habit.

How to wean?

If parents undertake to wean a child from telling them lies, they must understand that there is nothing more effective than their own example.

The child must necessarily trust mom and dad, knowing that the parents will not deceive him under any circumstances. If it is customary in the family to make promises and not keep them, or “jokingly” deceive the baby, then it is difficult to expect that the child will grow up as a model of truthfulness and honesty.

The advice of a psychologist will help to cope with the problem of a child’s deceit:

If a child begins to tell his parents an obvious lie about his incredible abilities, it means that he wants to seem to others better than he really is. It should be noted that this is a rather alarming sign. It is worth considering why a child has to attract attention and deserve praise with inventions? Perhaps he is given little attention in the family, or are his parents very stingy with praise and encouragement? It is worth convincing your son or daughter that his parents love him the way he is.

A common reason for lying is the desire to avoid punishment. You should think about whether they are too strict with the child in the family? For example, it is pointless and even harmful to punish a child for something he did unintentionally. And if prank or laziness led to unpleasant consequences, then one should be punished according to the simple principle of eliminating the consequences: “I broke a vase - remove the pieces”, “I got a bad grade at school - sit down and learn the missed topic”, etc.

Often a child begins to invent self-justifications for himself if he realizes that he has done something bad. For example, he undeservedly offended his younger brother. To the mother’s reproaches, many children begin to look for excuses for their actions: “He himself began to climb on me first!” etc. It is very difficult to deal with such a lie, since it is aimed at restoring one's own self-esteem. In no case should parents, without understanding, punish a tomboy. You need to calmly and exclusively in a friendly tone to analyze the situation.

Children, getting into a new team, often begin to invent various stories about their family. For example, they say that they have a wide variety of electronic gadgets at home or that his mother is a famous actress. Such lies, as a rule, appear at about 7 years old, that is, when the child enters school. Her appearance indicates that the child is not satisfied with his position in the team. How to deal with such tales? First, one must try to explain that having all the toys in the world does not bring happiness. And to be appreciated and respected by friends, it is enough to be a good and friendly person.

Very often, lies arise in response to overly strict demands from parents. For example, if a child of 7-9 years old is strictly forbidden to do what his peers are allowed to do (walk alone in the yard, go on an excursion with the class, etc.). In this case, the desire to be no worse than comrades usually overpowers, and the child composes a "tale" for his parents. For example, he reports that he went out into the yard with his grandmother, although in fact she was unlearned on business. There is only one way to wean from such lies: to reconsider the priorities of education. The word “no” should not be the most popular when communicating with a child with parents. Prohibitions, of course, are needed, but they must be justified, and not like this: “I forbid, and that’s it!”.

The child does not live up to expectations. Often parents try to realize their own dreams through their children. For example, a mother stubbornly takes her daughter to figure skating, although she likes to draw. In this case, at the first opportunity, the child will begin to evade the need to engage in an uninteresting business, coming up with various reasons. In this case, the only way to wean from lies is to learn to listen and take into account the wishes of the child himself.

Parents, educators, teachers, neighbors, books and cartoons tell children that it is not good to lie, you need to be honest. Why does the child still keep silent about something, hide something, do forbidden things on the sly, or, looking directly into the eyes, give deliberately incorrect information?

Children are very impulsive, they live in the here and now, it is very difficult for them to hold back from getting what they want at the moment. This is due to the lack of formation of certain areas of the brain. Often they do not even have time to think whether they can now take something, do it or not, they act spontaneously.

But what do they then hear from their parents? “Why did you take it without permission?”, “What have you done? What a horror!”, “Don’t you dare do it again! If you do it, I’ll punish you!”, “Shame on you!”, “You upset me very much.”

As a result, the child is ashamed, accused, frightened. But all because of the same features of the development of the child's brain and the lack of certain neural connections, the next time he will again do something similar, no matter how much he wants to continue to act differently. But in order to avoid punishment and not upset his parents, he will most likely prefer to hide or lie about it.

Children look up to their elders and really want to be like them - bigger, faster, smarter, more influential, etc. Since this is not possible right now, they have to fantasize and imagine that they already are. Therefore, they like to embellish reality or tell something that actually did not happen.
Of course, if a child sees adults lying, he will do the same. Some parents themselves teach the child to lie when they ask him to hide something from the younger or tell a lie to the caregiver or teacher. His same behavior towards parents and other people is not something surprising and outrageous, but quite a natural phenomenon.
Another reason for lying is protest, resistance to the influence of adults, their pressure and control. In such a situation, to the questions of parents, who once again check whether the child has brushed his teeth, whether he has done his homework, whether he has removed the toys, the children answer lies. Thus, they expand their borders and, as it were, inform that this is their territory, there is no need to climb here.
Also, children can invent all sorts of fables and play pranks in order to attract attention to themselves.

As you can see, children do not lie out of bad intentions - this is how they adapt to the conditions in which they find themselves.

What to do if the child is lying?

The most important thing is to establish a trusting relationship with him. To do this, you first need refuse punishment, intimidation, accusations and humiliation. Pay more attention to what your child is doing well. Let your child know that you will not scold and punish him for misconduct and try to really treat them more calmly.

Explain what consequences his actions can lead to (when people deceive, they stop believing). Tell me about your experience and feelings, about how unpleasant it is for you to be told a lie, and how it is for you honesty matters and why.

At harmless fantasies the child can join him and turn it into a game that can have a therapeutic effect - living in the imagination what he dreams of, the child forms a positive image of himself, feels confident and satisfied with his life.

If you feel from a child a lot of resistance, then you should pay attention to whether you are strangling him with your excessive control. Give him more room to make his own choices and get his own consequences, let him express himself. And make sure that if you need help, he can count on you.

remember, that kids don't lie out of malice, they have some reason for this, and they need to deal with it. And, of course, talk more often about how you love him and will always love him, no matter how he behaves.

Last but not least, don't forget your personal example! You need to be very attentive to your promises: give them only when you are sure that you can fulfill, and be sure to keep your word. speak the truth children and in front of children, make honesty your value, make sure that your actions match your words and admit your mistakes.

Comment on the article "What to do if a child is lying: 6 tips"

Section: Education (The child is deceiving). lie and truth, oh many letters :) Three cases in a row.

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the child began to steal money. Situation .... A child from 7 to 10. Daughter, she lies that she didn’t take it, dad begins to raise her tone that don’t lie, everyone knows everything here. I hope that the analysis somehow helps, I don’t think that the situation can be decided like this Based on someone's advice...

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Children's lies. To us adults, she seems so simple and naive. But the reasons that a child begins to lie to parents cannot be called harmless or insignificant. Does your child fantasize and pass these fantasies off as reality? Or is he telling a lie, trying to hide some of his actions and deeds from your vigilant attention? How to wean a child to lie? Do not rush to expose the little one and punish. After all, if we approach the problem from the point of view of psychologists, then, rather, educational work should be carried out, first, with the parents themselves. So that they do not mistakenly start to fight the investigation, which, in essence, lies are. But we tried to understand the reasons that prompt children to resort to such an unpopular way out of situations that are uncomfortable for them.

Children lie to their parents because for some reason they feel uncomfortable in their world.

It is a balm for spiritual wounds.
This is an internal conflict that has found a way out.
This is a lifeline in a seemingly hopeless situation.

And what is a child's lie for parents?

This is a distress signal.
This is a call for help.
This is an indicator that in the world of your beloved baby, not everything is as good as it might seem at first glance.

No matter how sad it may sound to you, the fact that the baby began to lie to you speaks of a crisis of confidence in your relationship. And it is you, the parents, who need to look for ways out of this crisis, as more experienced, balanced, authoritative.

Children lie when they stop trusting their loved ones.

Do not rush to expose the baby in a lie and scold him for it. Try to understand why the crumbs had a need to tell you a lie. After all, often, the reasons for children's lies are not at all those that are visible to you on a superficial examination.

You will not find a single recipe for solving this problem. Everyone will have their own. Depending on the problems of mutual understanding that have arisen between you and your child.

A crisis of trust between parents and children occurs when the older generation chooses the wrong model of relationships and not quite the right tactics for raising their children.

The kid will not lie to you if his life flows calmly and measuredly, if everything is in order with him. And do not think that he allows himself to tell you a lie, because the little one does not love and respect you.

Try to understand what is really behind his lies. What kind of need is the baby trying to satisfy in this way. This will be the answer to the question: "How to wean a child from lying?".

Children lie when they are afraid of punishment and censure

Why do children tell lies?

Any parent tries to give his baby all the best, tries to pass on his experience and his life wisdom to him, puts a piece of his soul into his beloved “blood”. But something, for all that, moms and dads, nevertheless, do not do it right. I wonder what it could be?

What are the reasons why, sooner or later, our children begin to tell us lies?

Too strict. If you punish the little one for the offenses he has committed, then you should not be surprised that the baby is lying to you, trying to avoid another censure for what he has done.
A game of feelings. If you defiantly get upset, grab your heart, blame the child for your poor health after his pranks or bad grades, you yourself provoke him to hide his mistakes in every possible way so as not to upset you.
Lack of attention. If the kid invents and tells everyone who is ready to listen to him, stories about a happy family, about how his parents love him, how attentive to him, then maybe all this is what he lacks in reality. And he plays pranks and lies only in order to attract your attention, which he so lacks.
Inferiority complex. The baby may be dissatisfied with himself. This happens when parents often criticize him, thereby developing an inferiority complex in a small person. A lie in this case is an attempt to change, to embellish a not too rosy reality. Be worthy of respect and admiration in your own eyes and in the eyes of others.
Limitations in expressing emotions . The child is not a robot. He cannot always have the same, certainly good, mood. He can be sad and upset, he can be annoyed and even enraged. And if he is prevented from expressing these emotions and giving them an outlet, he will simply withdraw into himself and begin to lie. For the sake of those who wish to see him always as a cheerful and cheerful toddler to his parents.
Fantasy. Dreamers and dreamers are perhaps the cutest and most attractive of all little liars. And such a lie is, rather, a manifestation of creativity and too much. The lies of visionaries are quite harmless if they are understood and directed in the right direction in time. Maybe you have a modern Jules Verne growing in your family or your own, native Jacques Yves Cousteau? ..

Or maybe your baby is not lying, but just fantasizing? Then you need to direct this feature of him in the right direction.

Well, how did you manage to determine its main causes by the nature of the child’s lie? If yes, then you have already gone halfway to eradicating this habit from your baby.

Now the main thing is to draw the right conclusions and diligently work on your own mistakes in.

How to wean a 4-5 year old kid from lying to parents?

It often happens that the child is still quite small, but he has already managed to face your disapproval.

And, afraid to once again see him in your eyes, afraid to lose your love, he, having done something that, as the baby is sure, will entail this very disapproval, uses lies as salvation, as protection. How to prevent lies, whatever their reasons, from becoming a habit, not becoming the norm for a baby?

If the child believes in your kind attitude towards him, he will not be afraid to confess his wrongdoing to you.

What should parents do in such circumstances?

Sit next to the baby so that your eyes are at the same level.
Calmly tell him that you know that the little one lied to you.
Ask the baby to tell you the truth, assuring him first that you will not be angry with him, as well as punish him.
Be sure to emphasize how much you love the baby. And no matter what he does, you will not love him less.
When the child gains confidence in you and tells you the truth, keep your word - do not blame him.
Help your little one deal with the situation. Explain what the child did wrong. And be sure to tell us how you should have acted in this situation.
Finish the conversation with another assurance that you love him, and are always ready to help the baby in any situation.

Of course, one such conversation is not always enough to fully restore trust.

Growing up, the child tries to protect his personal space from strangers. And he should be allowed to do so. Within reason, of course

What to do if a teenager (7-9 years and older) is cheating?

When children reach adolescence, very often the reason for their lies is the desire to create a personal space for themselves, a territory independent of adults, where only the child himself will be the owner.

And your task is to provide this territory to your teenager. Within reason, of course. But to give the child a real feel that he has moved to a new stage of growing up.

Mom and dad understand this. And we are ready to build relationships with him on a new level. But greater independence is not a synonym for permissiveness. Therefore, it is important here to clearly outline the framework of the independence of a teenager at this age stage.

And it is even more important that the child himself agrees with these frameworks. Discuss and be prepared to compromise. You can even sign a contract in writing. An agreement between two parties, when tangible, has great power.

If a teenager is sure that his parents love him, that they act only in the interests of his well-being, that they are always ready to listen, understand and forgive, he will not lie even if some agreements are violated.

Mom and dad, create trusting relationships in the family, become not only mentors, but friends for your child, and he will simply have no reason to tell you a lie!

A child can be honest with his parents

When he is not afraid of punishment, anger and loss of love of the closest people.
When he is sure that he will not be humiliated, no matter what happens.
When he knows that his parents will support him in any situation.
When you do not skimp on praise and encouragement.
When there is trust and mutual understanding between you and the child.

And never forget about personal example. How sincere, honest and open you yourself are, so your children will take these qualities from you. Create an atmosphere of harmony and harmony in your family. And then its small members will not seek salvation from adversity and loneliness in a lie ...

Video "How to wean a child to lie?"

Honesty is the quality that parents strive to instill in their children. But how bitter it is to realize that your beloved child, having barely learned to speak, begins to lie. Do not immediately despair, experts say that the problem of children's lies can be solved. Pedagogical recommendations will tell you what to do if the child is lying.

Causes of children's lies

Parents often ask themselves: why do children lie? Teachers say that this phenomenon can be caused by various reasons:

Lies as a consequence of childhood problems. The desire of the child to lie indicates that your son or daughter needs help. Children, like adults, have difficult times. And then a lie helps to find a way out of the situation, to assert oneself, to feel more confident. And adults, instead of branding their child as a liar, should delve deeper into his problems and help them figure it out.

Important! Parents, be your child's friend. Don't leave him alone with your problems. Solve them together as they come. And then in your relationship there will simply be no place for untruth.

Important! Having carefully studied the reasons for children's lies, you will be able to "keep your finger on the pulse", and the behavior of your child will be understandable and predictable for you.

What you need to know about the features of children's lies

Toddlers under the age of four, as a rule, do not lie. Growing up, they begin to understand that if you hide your bad deeds from loved ones, and embellish the good ones, then you can get a lot of benefit from this. After all, good things can be praised and encouraged. And bad deeds are followed by punishment. So, step by step, children master the slippery science of lying. And here the role of relatives is great. It is at this stage that they must catch the initial manifestations of lies and begin to fight them. If this is not done, then the child, believing in the impunity of his behavior, will get used to constantly lying.

Very often, adults, without noticing it, give a "role model" to their child. There are quite a lot of similar cases when children become witnesses of outright lies of their parents. And there is no guarantee that next time they will not behave the same way.

Important! Dear parents, try to build your relationships with loved ones in such a way that children do not become witnesses of your unseemly acts and facts of deceit.

How lie manifests itself at different age stages

Features of lies of young children

The age of 2 - 4 years is the age of dreamers. Toddlers are actively developing their imagination, and they invent a bunch of different stories with fictional characters. Fairy tales and the real world merge into one in his mind. And here the correct reaction of adults to the fantasies of the baby is very important. It is necessary to listen carefully to his story, but then very tactfully explain the reality to the child. But every time you can’t ignore the fantasies of a child either. And suddenly in front of you is a future science fiction writer. Compose fairy tales with him, write them down, draw pictures for them. Develop the creative imagination of a little dreamer.

Features of lying preschoolers

Preschoolers are forced to deceive by the fear of punishment, the fear of losing the love of their closest people, and sometimes the desire to extract some benefit for themselves. If parents show strictness towards their children, they perceive it as a lack of love. In order not to further aggravate this severity, the child, in an effort not to upset his parents, begins to lie: “I fed the fish today”, “I put all the books and toys in my room” (although in fact I didn’t do anything). But the need for parental love, for praise, makes him tell a lie.

The reaction of adults who have caught a son or daughter in a lie should not be aimed at condemning the child himself, but at disapproving the fact of his lie. Here it is important to establish trusting contact with the preschooler, to behave kindly towards him.

Important! Love your child always. And let the actions that upset you do not become an obstacle to your love for him. Build your relationship with your son or daughter in such a way that they understand that they are loved no matter what. And then there will simply be no need to tell a lie.

Features of lies of younger students

The child is in a new status for him - the status of a student. In this regard, he has an urgent need for a personal space in which he will feel like a small master. In addition, the younger student feels the need to please others. Therefore, children hide their negative actions with the help of lies. The role of parents here is to bring to the mind of the child the idea that the secret always becomes clear and that deception will not help solve the problem.

At this age, the younger student begins to lie in order to occupy a worthy niche among friends and classmates. He already distinguishes truth from untruth. However, he very skillfully invents about the non-existent material wealth of the family, about relatives - celebrities, about personal acquaintances with the famous athlete. What should parents do? Just remember your fables, with which you also probably surprised your friends. But the situation needs to be controlled.

In the transition to adolescence, new features of children's lies appear. Experts say that, having established the boundaries of their space, boys and girls are reluctant to let anyone in. Attempts by relatives to violate these boundaries lead to aggression, reproaches, and lies. If you are stubbornly not allowed into your space, then adults should think about the fact that there is no trust between them and the child. The roots of this problem may lie in an overly strict system of upbringing in the family. Parental control, prohibitions, punishments lead to the fact that protecting their right to privacy, the child begins to lie. The first thing to do is to revise the methods of education and try to win the trust of your own little man, otherwise lies will be his constant companion.

Important! Build your relationships with children on the basis of trust and mutual understanding. And then the child, feeling a friend in your face, will be able to reveal his cherished secrets.

How to recognize children's lies?

Parents often ask how to understand that a child is lying? There are certain signs that indicate this:

In a conversation, he repeats the last phrase you said in order to buy the time he needs to come up with a convincing answer.
When talking, he performs involuntary gestures: he pulls his ear, wrinkles his nose, scratches his head.
Realizing all the unattractiveness of his act (lie), he begins to speak in a quieter, sometimes even hoarse voice.
To hide the lie, it can distract you with empty talk.
The fact that the child is lying may be indicated by his posture: frequent changes in the position of the arms and legs.
Often a liar gives out a close, almost unblinking look.
If you carefully observe the deceiver during a conversation, then the following actions can give him away: coughing, licking his lips, unreasonably long pauses in response to a question addressed to him.

Parents' actions in case of children's lies

Let him know that you are aware of his lies.
Stay as calm as possible.
Do not put moral pressure on the child, do not hang labels.
Completely eliminate the possibility of physical punishment. Find worthy ways to deal with untruth: explain to the child why it is impossible to lie, give examples from children's books, favorite cartoons, turn to examples from the surrounding life (peers, relatives, neighbors), praise even the slightest attempt to tell the truth.
Reconsider your behavior and, if you yourself admit the facts of lies in the presence of your beloved child, try not to repeat them in the future.
Talk heart to heart with your daughter or son, explain that regardless of behavior, your love for him remains the same, but the very fact of lying is very upsetting.
Sign up for a consultation with a psychologist who will help teach your child to tell the truth.

The question is not easy. But the answer suggests itself - you can wean it, you just need to eliminate the reasons that prompt him to tell a lie.
Communicate more with your children, be interested in their affairs, school success, friends, share your problems, include them in family life.
Try to become an example of an honest and principled person for your son or daughter. Children tend to take our example.
Show your children that they can fully trust you in any situation.
Using life and literary examples, explain the consequences that a lie can lead to.
In the process of education, shift the emphasis towards the formation of the moral qualities of the individual, including honesty, which in the future will lead to a conscious understanding of moral norms.
Teach your child to be responsible for his actions, use everyday and specially organized situations for this.
Analyze your requirements for the child and if you find them tough enough, urgently change the measures of educational influence. But at the same time, remember that prohibitions cannot be completely eliminated, because. this is a sure step towards permissiveness.
Try to "resolve" the situation in such a way as not to punish the child for lying. Indeed, otherwise the child will simply hide the lie more carefully.
In case you think that punishment is inevitable, try to make the child realize its justice.
Build a parent-child relationship based on mutual understanding and trust, then perhaps your children will not have a reason to use lies as a way to solve their problems.

Important! You need to make sure that your child understands that you are his friend, and not the accuser in the court session.

Dear parents! Your desire to raise an honest and principled person is understandable and justified. Every day, every hour, teach this to your child. Teach by example, learn from the mistakes of others, but do not teach by punishment. Build the life of your family in such a way that honesty and truth are a cult and a slogan in it.